Today was hard. I am sitting in church and they are doing children dedications. I love these. As I watched these three families with their children I felt so much joy. Then it all changed. This stabbing pain in my heart. I began to cry. Why? Why can I not have a baby? Why has it been the desire of my heart and longing, yet everything I have tried has failed. I hurt. My stomach is turning. How I long for a baby of my own. I long to bold my baby in my arms. It may never happen. I feel empty and at a loss. I can not express what I fully feel inside. I just at know my heart is breaking.
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